Life, Love, and the Pursuit of… True Happiness!
By appreciating what you already have in your life, it will lead to a much happier life! We tend to put so much energy into what we want next in life. Instead, try to appreciate what you currently have before life passes you by. Most times, we’re so focused on what we don’t have vs. what we do, that we never truly enjoying life in the present day.
What’s the point of striving for things you’ll never be satisfied with anyways? Be grateful for what you have now. Don’t base your happiness on anything. Happiness is a choice! You choose how you feel in a day. If you wake up each day and choose to have a great day, you will. Yeah, life might get in the way and try to bring you down, but you have a choice in the way you react to every situation.
Think about when you wake up each day, how do you feel? Are you excited about life? If not, is there something that you are unhappy with? Figure out what that is if you don’t already know. Once you figure it out, make a change. I am, and always have been, a huge believer of this because no one can change or improve your life but yourself. If you’re unhappy the only way out is to make a change!
Learn to surround yourself with things that make you happy and don’t waste your time and energy on things that don’t. No one wants to live an unhappy life and honestly, no one wants to be around people who are unhappy all of the time either. Maybe you hate your job or maybe you’re in an unhappy relationship. Whatever it is that is making you unhappy in your life, change it. You are the only person in this whole world that can make you happy. If you’re unhappy with your story, write a new chapter!
If you’re unhappy with your job, figure out what it is that you’re not getting from that job that you need to be fulfilled as a person. Maybe it’s the position you are in. If so, see if you can find another position within your company that better suits your goals or career path. Or, maybe you need to make a career change all together. It could also be the company that you work for. If this is the case, find another company that better aligns with your morals and goal, and has what your current company is missing for you.
Maybe it’s not your career, maybe you are unhappy with your relationship. If so, work on it, communicate that with your spouse or partner and discuss how to improve it. They may be feeling the same way or have an idea on how to make things better. If not, there are so many different resources and tools to help improve your relationship, especially these days. One example, The Five Love Languages (see my Learning How to Love post for more detail on this), or maybe you need to reach out to a counselor or therapist.
You are the only one who can improve your life, and how you react to life is what your perception will be of it. Life will always have it’s hard times, it will always throw things at you that you can’t control. You may not be able to control the situation but you absolutely can control the way you respond to it. Even in some of the most difficult times, how you respond will make a huge effect on your happiness.
If you lose your job, focus on the positives like the ability to find a new job that is a better opportunity, maybe it will allow you more time with your family or will finally push you out of your comfort zone to follow your passion. Maybe you’re going through a divorce, focus on what you learned from that relationship that you can carry into your next or maybe it will allow you to find yourself again and do what you never had the chance to do. Or, maybe you’ve had a death of a loved one. Try to remember the time you had with them, the memories you shared, what you learned from their life and the positive effect it had on yours; while appreciating the opportunity to have had them in your life as long as you did.
I do believe that everything happens for a reason and sometimes that reason can be cloudier to see sometimes. I don’t think it is easy. Believe me, I’ve had my share of life thrown at me including relationship issues, deaths of loved ones, stressful jobs… etc. I haven’t always viewed life in this way or responded in the ways I should have.
At times, I would often look at other people’s lives and be envious of their perfect car or their perfect job or relationship, wondering why they had those things and I didn’t. I now realized a few things; first, people don’t usually show what they’re struggling with, they show the good times and the positives in their lives. The second, they are probably doing the same thing and being envious of someone’s life, or maybe even mine.
I still have my bad days and good days, and still have those thoughts sometimes. But, in an attempt to become the best me I can be, I’m trying my best, and really, that’s the best you can do. As humans, we will always mess up, we’re not perfect and no one ever will be. We each need to strive to be the best we can while appreciating what we have. I believe that is the key to happiness!
You only get one life, and when you’re always looking over your shoulder at the other person or looking for that next thing, whatever that may be, you’ll miss out on your life. You’ll never be truly happy if you’re always focused on other people or the next thing to make you happy. If you never appreciate what you have, what is the point of striving for it in the first place? Don’t get me wrong, you should always have goals in life and strive to improve yourself but while you are, don’t forget to “stop and smell the roses” because you don’t want to look back when you’re 100 years old and think, “I wish I would have enjoyed life more”.
Think about a time that you told yourself, I would be happy in life if I had ____ (whatever that is, maybe it’s a new car, a house or more money). Now, fast forward to once you achieved that. Where you completely happy? Did that complete your life with happiness? No, because you probably had a new goal that you were striving for to be happy. If you continue to look towards what you don’t have vs. what you do, you will never truly be happy. Appreciate what you have now and all that life has given you because I can guarantee that you have things to be grateful for and ironically, probably what that other person is envious of. Try to focus less on others and more on yourself, you will be a much happier person!
I can tell you that in 2016, I was at a very low point in my life after a job that wasn’t right for me and a relationship at one of its lowest point as a result of it. But, after this past year, 2017, I realized that I sure have a lot to be grateful for in life and I have never been happier! I have so much to be grateful for like my supportive family, friends, good health and a job. In addition to, having the ability to create this blog and share my life experiences with you while possibly make a positive impact on your life, I have never felt so grateful and fulfilled!
What are you grateful for in your life? What makes you happy? I would love for you to share, leave a comment below!
“Stop and smell the roses.” Walter Hagen